There's something I need to get off my chest here, so bear with me.
After all the panic attacks I've suffered recently (sparked off by a very disastrous job interview in Trimmingham a month or so ago) and some encouragement from Paul, I was referred to the NHS Wellbeing service, and told to expect a phone call from them in the next few weeks. The call came around 3 weeks ago, and to be perfectly honest, I was mildly shocked by the outcome when I was told that I've been suffering with some form of Social Anxiety Disorder.
Now I look back on that e-mail that Derek (My ex-employer) sent me a while back (full story in one of my entries from last year.) when he thought that I may be dealing with an extreme form of stress. In fact I was half expecting the same reaction from the NHS bloke, but when the Social Anxiety thing came up in the conversation, I immediately thought to myself "people who know me used to think I was nervous and shy, but Social Anxiety Disorder was the last thing on my mind". I was told that there was a possibility that Generalized Anxiety Disorder could be part of my problem as well, so me just putting it down to extreme stress may have been putting it very mildly to say the least. Anyway, I'm due to go over to Merchant's Place on Wednesday to see someone from the NHS Wellbeing service and discuss a possible treatment plan.
Since the diagnosis, my colleagues at About With Friends have been extremely helpful, with Richard (who works with me at the charity) coming up with ways to help me cope with the condition. (for which I'm truly grateful). And once I get started with the NHS Wellbeing service people on Wednesday, I should, all being well, regain a lot of the self-confidence I had lost after that interview in September.
It's likely to take a while, but I've a feeling the result's going to be worth it....
- Mark Radbourne
- Cromer, Norfolk, United Kingdom
I'm a former hospital radio/club/mobile DJ, avid record collector and amateur musician (playing guitar, keyboards, recorder, harmonica and percussion.) I've even filled in on bass guitar for a couple of local bands as well (although that was quite a few years ago). Also interested in Motorsports, Wrestling/Mixed Martial Arts and Classic Television and Radio from the 1960s - 1980s.
Why am I on here? Well, I'm just trying to make some sense of life before it's too late...but who cares anyway?